


Episode 4: Go To Hell (Literally)

by ZoidsFanatic



Series: Multiverse Series [4]
Category: Code Geass, Hazbin Hotel (Web Series), Queen's Blade, Zoids (Anime & Toys), sin 七つの大罪 | sin: Nanatsu no Taizai | Seven Mortal Sins (Anime 2017)
Genre: Crack Crossover, Crossover, F/F, Hell, Mystery, Spiritual, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:48:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25923877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoidsFanatic/pseuds/ZoidsFanatic
Summary: With Yoshika unable to help them for the time being, Lelouch and Van end up in hell having to help two sides of demons overcome their differences. Lelouch, meanwhile, has entirely different motives for being in the underworld.
Relationships: Charlie Magne/Vaggie
Series: Multiverse Series [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1881016
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	Episode 4: Go To Hell (Literally)

**Author's Note:**

> Due to being part of the Multiverse Saga, please start from Episode 1 in order to understand what’s going on.

Charlie paced back-and-forth in her office, twiddling her thumbs as she did so. They should be here by now.

"They should be here by now." She said aloud. "Ooohhh, I knew this was a bad idea." She grumbled. The only other person with her was Vagatha, who loudly sighed.

"Pacing isn't going to help." She replied, her arms folded and a scowl on her face. This was all Alastor's doing, she just knew it. Ever since that new gang showed up, it's been hell for The Hazbin Hotel. Well, that being more of a metaphor given the Hazbin Hotel, along with Charlie, Vagatha, and their merry friends were all living _in_ hell. This new gang, their leader calling herself Lucifer as if to just make Charlie angry, showed up out of nowhere one day and declared that they themselves would rule over hell. Unlike the other gangs, it seemed they were backing up their words with actions which brought them into conflict with Charlie and the hotel.

Not only was this conflict going to ruin the reputation of the hotel, but it was likely going to draw in the attention of the Exorcists. And if there was one thing Vagatha didn't want to face, it was those things. To make matters worse, a dead body was recently found on the steps on the hotel; as if the gang was warning Charlie and the hotel to stay out of their business or else face the consequences. This was all too much for Charlie, who did something that no demon ever dared think about. She requested help outside of hell, help from the living.

Van and Lelouch, two living humans. That's who Charlie requested for, although Vagatha did feel that the request was too specific and that Alastor was up to something. Then again, he always was up to something.

"Calling in humans. To Hell. What was I thinking?" Charlie finally stopped pacing and slumped into her chair and planted her face on the desk. "Why can't Alastor help us now?"

"Honestly, I'd rather deal with humans then him." Vagatha replied, checking her nails. As she did so the door to Charlie's office swung open and smacked her. In walked Husk, as sulking as ever, while behind him were Van and Lelouch. Covered in soot, with a small fire on Van's shoulder he just couldn't be bothered to asked.

"Hey, these guys showed up. Said they wanted to talk to you." Husk shrugged.

"Oh? Yes! Yes! It's them!" Charlie perked right back up.

"Alright, cool. Whatever." Husk muttered as he left the officer, shutting the door behind him. Vagatha, the outline of the door still on her face, stood there stunned while Van and Lelouch took their seats. Yoshika wasn't present with them, due to some unspecified reason.

"Alright." Lelouch began, pulling out a notebook and pencil and blowing the soot off them. "So, what service do you require?"

"Thank you soooo much for showing up! I'm sorry we had to drag you to hell! Ha ha! Get it? Dragged you to hell?" Van and Lelouch looked at her, both with blank expressions. Van coughed up a small cloud of soot. "Sorry. Trying to add some humor. Again, sorry for the trouble. Fire and brimstone season aren't fun for anyone." Charlie continued. "You know your shoulder is on fire?"

"I know." Van said. "I tried putting it out, but it won't go away."

"Oh. Allow me." Charlie leaned over and patted the fire out. "Again, I'm _really_ happy that you came. Also, not sure how you got here without dying, but you were highly recommended."

"Well, thank you." Lelouch replied. "But can…"

"Do you need drinks? Food? Anything at all? I'm sure we have something that's safe for humans." Charlie interrupted him again.

"No. We're good. Just want to know why we're called is all." Lelouch replied.

"Oh. Ahem. Yes. Yes, that." Charlie drummed her fingers on the table as Vagatha, having fixed her hair and face, took her spot besides Charlie. "You see, a month or so ago a new demon arrived. She called herself Lucifer and brought six demons with her." As Charlie spoke Lelouch began scribbling down notes, as suggested by Van so they would have solid information to work with. "She claimed that she would be the next ruler of hell and began to attack other gangs. And win. I tried getting into contact with her, but she refused. Can you believe it? Now she's getting more and more territory and I'm worried that the hotel may become a target. It wasn't too long ago a body was found at the steps, and I'm sure it was meant as a warning."

"And you didn't try to fight?" Lelouch asked. "No offense, but this is hell and violence rules the day."

"It's not that we haven't considered it." Charlie leaned back in her seat and looked up at Vagatha. "But I'd rather avoid violence."

"I could kick those bitches' asses if you just asked." Vagatha mumbled, folding her hands.

"This is why I called for you. I need someone to talk to Lucifer and, well, help meditate the situation." Charlie explained. "Outside help is what we need, someone without biases or agendas." She paused for a moment. "Biases and agendas that involve hell." She clarified, given that Van and Lelouch did have agendas and biases of their own.

"OK. Can you tell me where these demons are? What they look like?" Lelouch asked.

"Their base of operations is on the other side of town and the…"

"They look like whores. But the ones you know you'll get an STD from if you fuck." Vagatha cut off Charlie, to her annoyance.

"They dress very skimpy. They're very human-looking, you won't miss them." She added.

"OK." Lelouch finished writing on his notepad and handed it to Van. All what Lelouch wrote was "look like sluts", "turf war", and below that was a crude picture of a dead body. Van just nodded and handed back the notepad. "We'll get right on it!"

"Oh! Thank you thank you! If there is anything you need, let me know, OK?"

"Sure. But we're professionals. We'll go talk with Lucifer and arrange for you two to meet and sort things out." Lelouch reassured her. As the two left, Vagatha turned to Charlie and expressed her concerns.

"You know I love you, sweetie, but are you sure these two are going to help? Not only are they, well, alive, but having them attempt to meditate you and Lucifer's feud… honey don't take this the wrong way, but this may be a very bad idea."

"Well." Charile tapped her fingers together. "If this doesn't work we can always put on that musical."

"OK, maybe this is a better idea." Vagatha corrected herself. On the other side, Lelouch was expressing his concern for Van.

"You OK? You're… quieter than usual. I would expect you to have a snark or a remark or something?"

"Lelouch. I'm in _literal_ hell. Before we got here we had to fight off sentient eggs. My shoulder was on fire, my body is covered in soot. Let's just get this job done, so I can go home and not be in _actual_ fucking hell." Van replied, his face completely stern. Lelouch just shrugged.

"Alright, well grab on." Van put his arm on Lelouch's shoulder and closed his eyes, knowing that they'd have to make a "layover" before arriving at Lucifer's lair. When he opened his eyes, Van found that Lelouch had brought him into another hell, but this one was blocker, and he heard in the distance what sounded like a cat and child crying. "OK, you took me from hell, to another hell, so we could get back to hell."

"Hey, if anyone tells you to go to hell you can tell them you did!" Lelouch replied, as he and Van made the next jump to end up just outside of Lucifer's lair. Fittingly, at least according to Vagatha, this lair was a strip club. An abandoned and run-down one, but it seemed most of these buildings in hell were run down and looked abandoned. Out front was a guard, at least the two guessed it was a guard. She was a purple-haired girl wearing a crop-top and a belt, possibly nothing under that belt, along with stripped knee socks. She carried a stuffed animal, or possibly a living animal, and was talking to herself.

"So." Van asked. "What's the plan?"

"We're going to have to fight her." Lelouch replied.

"Wonderful. With what exactly? We're in hell. I doubt regular bullets will work."

"Well." Lelouch turned to Van. "You're in luck. Yoshika's world does have bullets with encapsulated magic!"

"Do we have them?"

"No!" Lelouch smiled. "But I have one better. Ta-da!" He presented Van with a tomahawk, not unlike ones used in military forces. "I remember you going on about axes, so I got you this magic tomahawk. Guaranteed to be effective against all manner of monsters and supernatural!" Van took the weapon and unsheathed it. It was lightweight while the blade seemed to glow and buzz as if it had some sort of power. Only one way to find out.

"Alright, stay here." He told Lelouch. He was going to have to fight this demon on his own. He strolled down to her and leveled the tomahawk at her. The girl stopped and looked at Van.

"That's a cool looking ax. Levi wants one! It looks cool!" She complained, puffing her cheeks out and stomping her foot.

"We're here to see Lucifer, so either move aside or I'll… fight you…" He tried to think of something cool to say, but really couldn't. It was hard to act tough when your opponent was throwing a fit about the tomahawk.

"Eh? You're here to see Onee-sama?" She cocked her head. "Then why are you challenging Levi to a fight?"

"You're not a guard?"

"No." She shook her head.

"Then… why are you out here?"

"Onee-sama had business and said Levi was being annoying and told Levi to stand outside." The other replied. With a smile she placed her hands on her hips and tilted her body to the side. "Levi's name is Leviathan, the sin of Envy. But you can call Levi Levi. Levi's jealous you're going to talk to Onee-sama. Levi wants to talk to her!" Van was taken aback but decided to just run with it. No point getting into a fight if he didn't have to.

"So… can you take me to Lucifer?" He asked. Leviathan put a finger to her lip and looked up at nothing in particular, clearly lost in thought.

"Well, OK. Levi guesses Onee-sama should be finished with her business now. Follow Levi!" She led Van inside, which in turn meant Lelouch was left outside. He should be fine, Van hoped. The inside of the strip club was exactly what Van would imagine the inside of an abandoned strip club to be. Dusty, poor lighting, but apparently Lucifer and her gang called this place home. As they made their way deeper inside, Leviathan pointed out the other demons. There was Satan, dressed in red and angry as all hell. Asmodeus, who licked her lips at Van. Mammon, surrounded by piles of money she was rolling in. Beelzebub, the smallest, who was chowing down on a massive piece of meat. Finally, there was Belphegor, who was lounging in a booth and didn't pay much attention to either of them. Van couldn't help but feel he was in danger.

"And here is where you'll find Onee-sama." Leviathan stopped at an office door and knocked on it. "Onee-sama, you have a visitor!" She called out. The other side was quiet, but the door swung open and there stood Lucifer herself. Her eyes had bags under them while she held a spear in her left hand. She glared at Leviathan and then Van.

"And who is this?" She asked.

"I dunno. He said he wanted to talk to you, Onee-sama." Leviathan replied. Lucifer loudly sighed.

"You brought someone you don't know into our base, who's holding an ax, I might add, and at no point did you think this wasn't a good idea?"

"It's a cool ax, isn't it? Levi wants one like it." She then hugged tightly onto Lucifer. "But if he is bugging you, Levi can kill him." Lucifer wasn't really having it with Leviathan today and pushed her aside.

"No, you're the one bothering me. Go stand back outside and don't come back in until you learn to stop letting strangers in!" Lucifer demanded. Leviathan puffed her cheeks out and stormed out of the strip club while Lucifer let Van into her office. "Well, what do you want?" She asked, taking a seat behind an old desk.

"Oh… Sorry, I was kinda expecting… well never mind." Van replied, sheathing the tomahawk and attaching it to his belt. "I come here on the request of Charlie."

"Oh, for the love of…" Lucifer paused and tried to consider what deity to swear at. "Cthulhu. This again?"

"Again?"

"Yes, _again_. Ms. Princess of Hell already requested stopping my expansion on the idea that the residents of hell could be somehow rehabilitated. And for what? So, they can go to heaven and be under the watchful gaze of an uncaring and cruel God? The same one that sends his own demons to hunt these demons?"

"Well… I'm here on her account to ask you if you could meet with her and sort things out. Look, I truthfully don't care if you two want to have a civil discussion or start beating the ever-loving shit out of one another." Van replied. "I'm just the messenger."

"You're human." Lucifer pointed out with a sniff. "And… somehow still alive."

"Yes. I know." Van replied.

"Hmmm. Interesting that she would drag a human into this." Lucifer grinned, which made Van feel quite uneasy. "Very well, I shall meet with her but only if you do something for me." She folded her arms. "I request that you bring me the tears of an angel."

"Sure." Van nonchalantly replied. "Tears of an angel, coming right up."

"You sound confident." Lucifer said, although Van just shrugged and left the club as fast as he could least any of the demons decided to take more than a passing interest in him. Finding Lelouch exactly where he had left him, Van explained Lucifer's request.

"So, the tears of an angel, huh?" Lelouch cupped his chin and hummed.

"Seeing as you clearly know supernatural entities, you're sure to know an angel." Van said. After all, Lelouch did quite literally dragged him to hell. So, finding an angel should be easy.

"I know of one angel." Lelouch replied. "If she can help us or not, I wouldn't know, but would be worth a shot. After all, I'd rather not return to the client empty handed."

"Yeah. Neither do I. So, let's go!" Van replied. In honesty, Van didn't want his soul condemned to hell. He already felt it becoming more tainted and twisted the longer he was there, although that may have just been because he was near Lelouch. The two made the jump, uneventful as it was thankfully, and arrived on the outskirt of a forest.

"She should be around here… I think." Lelouch began to look around, mostly just scanning the horizon.

"Say, how exactly does your power work?" Van asked, seeing as now was the best time to ask.

"Hmm?"

"Like how you can jump from one place to the other all the time and, outside a few instances, not end up inside an active volcano?"

"Oh? Guess I haven't explained it to you properly." Lelouch replied, still looking for whoever or whatever.

"Would be nice to know given I'm blindly trusting you to return me home in one piece."

"What I do is imagine of, say a person, place, or thing and then when I use my Geass I show up near that person, place, or thing. Sometimes on top of. Or beside it. For places I can have pin-point accuracy so long as I visited the place before and think of one specific spot. For people, well, it's more of arriving in their relative vicinity unless they haven't moved." He explained, which took Van aback. Here he thought Lelouch was having to do some space wizard shit or quantum calculations, when all Lelouch was doing was thinking very hard on something and then he would end up there, or nearby at the very least. Which meant of course Lelouch did need a vague understanding of the area he was to go to or the people he was to meet, which lead to a whole plethora of other questions.

"Wait a minute." Van said. "Why didn't you just use your powers before so we could have shown up right where the cats were?" He was referring to the previous mission which ended with them having to break up a prostitution racket.

"You want the honest answer?" Lelouch asked, Van nodded his head. "I... _kinda_ was having too much fun."

"Of course." Van sighed, deciding for the time being to not ask anymore questions. So long as Lelouch could picture something in his mind then a jump would go smoothly unless of course there was that "layover in Atlanta" as he once joked. Van still didn't know what an Atlanta was, or a layover.

"Ah, look!" Lelouch pointed to a blue-haired girl in the distance. On closer inspection, she had wings with one being smaller than the other. "There's our, well I hesitate to use the word angel here, but she is technically one. Her name is Nanael. I met her when I was... um... here on... 'business'."

"Buisness, huh? How'd that go?" Van asked.

"It didn't go well. Did not go well at all." He replied.

OK. So, how do I make her cry? You must know her, right?" Van asked, taking a glance at Nanael who seemed to be mumbling to herself. His original plan of kicking her in the shins was out because she had armored leggings, and as he was just wearing boots attempting to kick her would make _him_ cry.

"Hmmm." Lelouch cupped his chin.

"Wait, you have that power to control people. Can't you just use that and make her cry?" Van asked.

"I would if I could but… um… it doesn't work here." Lelouch lied, badly. Van once again sighed but decided it was best to not pry. "I remember!" Lelouch slammed one of his fists into his palm. "She has this magic milk, or something, tied to her waist. Threaten to spill it!" While Van felt that was needlessly cruel, he then remembered his original plan was to just kick her in the shin. So regardless what he did, he'd be a bully.

"Alright. But do you have anything I can hold the tea…" Before he could finish Lelouch pulled out a vial from his pocket and gave it to Van, who once again decided it was best to just not ask any questions of where he was carrying it or why. After all, he had a magic tomahawk on his person he seemingly pulled from nowhere. Taking the vial he left Lelouch alone again and approached Nanael, who upon seeing him grew a very broad grin which Van knew meant nothing good was going to come from this. "You must be Nanael." Van said.

"Hehehe, that's right." Nanael replied. "How lucky I am for such a _handsome_ man to know who I am."

"Hey, thanks." Van said. "Question, could you do me a favor? I need you to cry." The grin on Nanael's face grew even bigger and she began to rub her cheeks and turn her head side-to-side.

"Oh ho, for such a request. And we only just met!"

"Not like _that_. Look, I need your tears because I'm trying to make sure one demon doesn't fight another demon and for whatever reason that first demon will only talk to the other if I bring her some angel tears." He put the vial forward. "We can play innuendos all day, but I'd like you to just cry in this vial so I can do my job!" Nanael stopped her little imagination game for a moment and put a finger to her chin and looked up at the sky.

"Hmmm. I could provide that. So long as you provide me with some service…" She slyly said. Van wasn't going to take this anymore. Without warning he grabbed the small bottle at her hip and pulled it away from her.

"Start crying now or I'm spilling this!" He threatened her. And it worked, strangely enough. She began to loudly cry and proclaim Van to be a bully. Van quickly pressed the vial against her face and let a few tear drops trickle in before sealing it and then returning her bottle to her. She grabbed it, puffed her cheeks out and stuck her tongue out at him. "Pleasure doing business with you!" He called out before running back to Lelouch. He didn't feel like sticking around to see if Nanael would retaliate or not. Leaving the peaceful forest's edge, the two went right back to hell and this time Van dragged Lelouch with him, not really wanting to walk into the office of someone named Lucifer again without a quick method of escape. Passing by the demons, doing their usual demonic things, the two were stopped by Asmodeus.

"My my!" She chirped. "What _handsome_ young men." She licked her lips with a hungry intent. "Where might you two be going? To see Lucifer?" By now Van noticed that the others were taking notice of their presence.

"Yes. We are." Van said bluntly. "We have urgent matters to attend to."

"They can't be _that_ urgent." Asmodeus replied. "You both look so tired. Why don't you come rest? With. _Me_." She mouthed the words as seductively as possible, which left both Van and Lelouch completely unphased.

"Actually, that is a good idea. You've had a rough day Lelouch, how's about you take a breather." He pushed Lelouch straight into Asmodeus's bosom, who loudly moaned.

"OH! How sudden!" She gasped, holding Lelouch extremely tight between her breasts and leaving the poor bastard to flare his arms ineffectually. As the others closed in on Lelouch, Van slipped past them and went to Lucifer's office. She was still there, rubbing what looked like polish on her spear.

"OK, I'm back." Van said, tossing the vial onto the desk. "Angel tears, like you requested." She picked up the vial and examined it, shaking it a bit before nodding her head.

"Well done. I didn't know you could even do such a thing. And so quickly, in fact." She commended him. "I won't ask how you found an angel or got their tears."

"Great, because I don't plan to ask what you're going to do with the tears." He replied.

"Actually nothing. I wanted to see if you were a waste of my time or not. You apparently aren't. So, I will stand by my word and meet with the Princess of Hell."

"Today." Van added.

"I never gave a time."

"Yeah, well, I can't exactly leave until you two meet and settle things. Besides, neither one of us put it in words or on paper of when this meeting was to take place. I demand it happen now."

"Such a tricky man." She pointed her gleaming spear at Van, poking him with the tip. "Very well, you've amused me enough. We shall leave now and speak with her."

"That's all I ask." Van said as Lucifer rose from her seat, spear in hand. The two left the office and found Lelouch in a compromising position with the girls. Which amused Van to no end.

"Come." Lucifer ordered, the others quickly stopping what they were doing to poor Lelouch to follow Lucifer. As they left, Van helped Lelouch backed up and straightened his shirt along with getting him back to his senses. After making sure Lelouch was at least in physical shape, not so much mental, they made a jump to the Hazbin Hotel, first stopping in a garden that was filled with nothing by rot and filth to the point that calling it a garden was an insult to spoken language and then finally arriving in the lobby of Hazbin Hotel. The demons hadn't arrived yet, but that didn't mean there weren't plenty of other demons at the hotel. One was a strange white and pink-spotted four-armed demon, with a sense of fashion that made Lelouch sick to his stomach.

"Well hello there, handsome. Didn't see the two of you walk through the front door." He smiled. "Names' Angel Dust." He presented two arms to greet them while the other two arms stood pinned to his waist.

"T-Thanks." Van replied. "Have you seen Charlie around?"

"Oh? Little Miss Princess? Yeah, she's up in her office but say, why don't I buy you fellas a round? Maybe we could have one hell of a time?"

"I'm good." Lelouch replied, his eye twitching.

"Same. Maybe later. Urgent business and all that." Van added, pushing past Angel Dust with Lelouch in tow.

"Well don't be a stranger now. I'll be here if you want to pass the time, toodles!" Angel Dust cried out as the two made their way to Charlie's office, before being stopped once more, this time by a bright red demon with hair that resembled animal ears.

"Well hello there, gentlemen, I didn't know the hotel had any new guests." He grinned; his mouth filled with razor sharp teeth while his voice was filled with static.

"We're not new guests. We're just here on business." Van replied, as this new demon somehow slinked his way between the two and put his thin arms around their shoulders.

"Come now, no need to be hostile. Say, you're humans, right? Would you be up for maybe doing me a favor, boys?" It asked.

"No." Van stoutly replied. "We're fine. Thanks."

"I'm sure you are." The demon replied, as it sunk away into the shadows until the only thing remaining was its grin before that too vanished.

"Well that was scary, huh Lelouch?" Van said. "Hopefully that'll…"

"OH! Is that men!" Came another voice, from a smaller one-eyed demon that suddenly appeared before the two.

"Oh God Damnit!" Van swore as she sniffed them.

"And humans! Human men! Dirty human men. Hmmm." She was very nimble, quickly jumping between the two and picking off dirt and grim. "Dirty shoes. No no no, this won't do. I just cleaned, gentlemen!" She complained.

"Look, we just want to see Charlie…" Before he could finish a loud commotion came from downstairs. It was Lucifer and her crew, who barged into the lobby after kicking the door in. Husk, who was manning the desk, looked up from his pornographic magazine at the women and loudly sighed.

"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Do you have a reservation?" He asked, as Lucifer strolled right up to him and pointed her spear at his throat.

"Where's the princess?" She demanded; Husk not being remotely phased with the sharp object pointed at his neck.

"Princess? Charlie you mean?" He asked. "She's in her office. Would you like for me to make you appointment?" At this moment Satan, who looked ready to fight, waltzed up to the counter and slammed her fists down with enough force to leave dents.

"Can you not answer a simple question you stupid…" What was Husk exactly? "Thing?"

"Look, if you're going to be rude than I won't help you. Fuck off." Husk turned his back on them and began flipping through his magazine again.

"We were told to come here. By some human." Lucifer stated, ushering for Satan to step back. Husk perked up a bit when he heard this.

"Humans? Yeah, there were some humans. Guess if they called you that means you have business with Charlie. Like said, she's in her office." Husk replied, pointing up.

"Then I shall go see her." Lucifer didn't even bother to thank him, the nerve of that bitch he thought to himself. "You all remain here. That also means _you_ , Leviathan."

"Boooo." She complained. Lucifer didn't respond as she made her way to Charlie. Along the way she passed Lelouch, Van, and the one-eyed demon who darted behind Lelouch and Van upon seeing the imposing woman.

"That's Lucifer herself? What is she doing here?" The demon asked. While Van explained what was going on, Lucifer ended her match to Charlie's office and knocked on the door. Vagatha opened it, and her face immediately soured. Slamming the door in Lucifer's face she muttered something Lucifer couldn't hear before opening the door again. This time, she stopped her.

"You're spear." She demanded, pointing her own spear at Lucifer. While rolling her eyes, she did as requested and soon Vagatha was holding two spears. Not that Lucifer would need either one of them if the other was foolish enough to attack.

"Lucifer." Charlie rose from her desk. "I'm glad you came."

"Your little messenger was persistent." Lucifer sat in one of the chairs opposites of the desk and crossed her legs. "I heard you wanted to work something out?"

"Yes. For far too long these gang wars have ravaged hell, making hell…"

"What? A hell? Princess, you do know where you are?"

"Yes, I do." Charlie folded her arms. "It is my duty to ensure the subjects of hell are properly cared for. Therefore, I'm trying to end the fighting and rehabilitate souls." At this, Lucifer loudly laughed which enraged Vagatha to no end. Charlie had to wave her off, least she struck Lucifer.

"Rehabilitate souls? The souls of sinners?" Lucifer asked. "You do know that this is hell, this is the punishment for humans who don't live up to the lofty heights of their God. Eternal damnation. Do you know why we're called the Seven Mortal Sins? Our job was to tempt mortals and drag them to hell, which worked well. All until God and his band of angels threw a hissy fit because things weren't going his way. We were banished from one hell to the next, finally arriving here."

"So why are you trying to conquer hell?" Charlie asked, curious about Lucifer admitting to being from another hell.

"To bring order to this hellhole. The sooner we can do that, the sooner we can tempt humans once more."

"Hell is already crowded. If you do that more and more Exorcists will arrive and commit, well, more genocide." Charlie replied.

"So? We'll just kill them. We've fought angels before."

"But not like the Exorcists…" Charlie glumly replied. "Look, Lucifer, we don't have to fight you know. We both have aligned goals. We want to bring order to hell. Why not work together?"

"Let me guess." Lucifer began. "You want me and the others to try to use our power to better the damned so they can go to heaven where they get to live on fluffy clouds for eternity? Tell me, what will happen to heaven if it gets overpopulated? Will your God decide that murdering both heaven and hell is what's truly just?"

"No…" Charlie replied.

"If heaven is empty and hell is full, what would change is heaven is full and hell is full? Nothing, that's what. So long as you have a God who can't comprehend in his infinite wisdom to just make more space than the war in hell will never end. Besides, God doesn't want us. He wants little rule followers and those that bend their knee to his slightest whim." Charlie sunk back in her chair, defeated. Lucifer was bringing up good points, but no she couldn't be right. There had to be hope, somewhere. And Charlie was going to ensure that Lucifer would see that.

"I'm sorry, but you forced my hand." She rose from her seat and leaned over the desk. "I am the Princess of Hell, and you're not. Therefore, I'm not asking but commanding you to stop your petty fight and work with me."

"You? Command me?"

"Alright. If you won't listen to reason." She stood up and folded her arms. "Then you'll listen to force."

"Oh-ho? Challenging me, are we?" Lucifer smiled. Charlie did not smile, in fact, she was frowning.

"Vagatha, please go outside for a moment. And give Lucifer her spear back."

"But…" She tried to protest but was cut off.

"Vaggie. Wait. _Outside_." Charlie demanded once more. Vagatha nodded her head, giving Lucifer her spear before slowly backed out of the room. She knew what was about to happen and wished Charlie didn't have to do it. Sometimes force will only acknowledge force, and Lucifer seemed hellbent on only answering to force. Vagatha was surprised to find the entire population of the hotel, along with Lucifer's demons, and the two humans standing outside the office.

"Were you spying on us?" She asked, to which the group mumbled a hasty yes. "The nerve of…" Before she could finish, a commotion came from the office. At first it was screaming, and then devolved into the sounds of a very intense fight. The sounds of falling books mixed with broken glass soon gave way to what sounded like a raptor imitating a chainsaw before fading into what sounded like a coked-up chipmunk.

"I bet fifty on the broad." Angel Dust said, as everyone was watching the door in anticipation. Dusk slipped him a bill which Angel Dust immediately slipped into his cleavage. Mammon reached into Angel's Dust cleavage and took Dusk's money which she slipped into her cleavage; no one else except Dusk noticing his money changing cleavages. After another five minutes of wails, screams, animal noises, and what sounded like an 8-bit arcade game but possessed by a poltergeist Charlie swung open the door triumphantly. Her hair was messy, and her clothes ruffled, but beyond that she looked fine. Lucifer, on the other hand, had seen better days. Her clothes were torn up, her hair a complete mess, some blood was trickling from her mouth, and her spear looked as if it was bent.

"Well… good news everyone, we came to an agreement!" Charlie brimmed, fixing her hair. "Lucifer and her entourage will help us, and in turn we'll let Lucifer have control over her current territory. Right?" She turned, a wide smile plastered on her face, to Lucifer.

"Y-Yes." She coughed, straightening herself up. "After some… _debate_ I have decided that it is best for us to partner with the hotel."

"And no one else has a problem with this, right?" Charlie turned to the crowd; the smile still plastered to her face. In unison everyone nodded their head. "So, I have to ask now that I have you all gathered, why did you leave a body on our front steps?"

"Body?" Lucifer asked. She turned to her group. "Did any of you leave a body here? And be honest." She glared, but her group shook their heads no in unison. "We didn't leave any bodies here."

"But Niffty said she saw one of your people leaving a body on our steps. Isn't that right Niffty?" She turned to the small, one-eyed demon who was currently frowning at Belphegor for some reason or another.

"Hmm? Oh… I never said it was one of them. I said it was a tall, dark figure." She replied, leaving Charlie with a confused expression.

"Um." Lelouch rose a hand, all eyes turning on him. "Mind if we see the body?"

"But of course!" It was the red demon, Alastor, who answered and with a click of his fingers a body materialized a few inches above the floor. Landing with a soft plop on the floor, the body was that of a man wrapped in bandages. "I may have withheld this information, but I recognize this man. His name was Shishio, some Japanese assassin from hundreds of years ago who's been trying to rule hell since he arrived." Alastor grinned, looking over the body. "Strange he doesn't have that woman with him." He rubbed his chin. "But alas, he had such good intentions. Never could carry them through." As Alastor rambled on, and Beelzebub poked the body, Lelouch took a turn to examine the body. There was a large slash on its chest, while he made out bite marks on the leg.

"I know who did it." Lelouch announced. "This is the handy work of Enon!" He announced the name in a dramatic fashion, but everyone looked at him quizzically. Except Alastor, who was still smiling. "Oh… right… none of you would know him." He folded his arms. "As you may know I'm not a normal human, I have the ability to transverse different worlds." Again, everyone looked at him quizzically. "Anyhow, as I mentioned to my friend before, others have the same ability as me. Entire organizations even. But I won't harp on with that. Enon is a boogieman. A mechanical killer."

"This is hell, baby." Angel Dust shrugged. "Everyone's a killer here."

"Exactly why he is here. He thrives on violence, on the hunt." Lelouch looked down at the body. "And if this guy was as ancient as you said, and was an assassin, Enon likely was hunting him. I think he wasn't leaving the body here on purpose, it's just where he slayed him."

"And how can you be so sure?" Charlie asked.

"Clean cut, lack of blood, and this bite mark." He lifted the leg. "Hail mark of Enon's hunting dog-scorpion-thing. If I had to guess, which I'm doing, is that he tried to make a run for it and Enon's pet bit his leg. He collapsed on the front steeps where Enon finished him off."

"So you're saying that the only reason why we're here now is because the Princess thought we killed someone and dragged you two down here, made us make a pact, and it turns out it's because of someone not related to either side?" It was Lucifer who spoke up, her voice dripping with anger.

"Yes." Lelouch replied but was careful to watch what he said next. "However, this is a good thing. Enon thrives in chaos so having a more, well, unified front will scare him off and let you guys kill each other without having to worry about another party at work. So, it's a good thing when you think about it!" He exclaimed. Lucifer gripped her bent spear tightly, about ready to pounce on Lelouch and rip his head off right then and there. She decided, however, not to. After all Charlie did beat her in a fight fair and square so she conceded that having Charlie as an ally wasn't completely bad. For now, at least.

"Very well." She replied. "Our business is done here. Come along, we're going home." Lucifer directed her group to leave, which they did with haste. With that, the job was done and something of a pact was established. For Van, it was rather anti-climactic, but he was glad it was finished. Wasn't so glad the only payment he received was a shirt that says, "I Went to Hell and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt". He would take that over his soul being damned, however. As for Lelouch, he instead got something a bit different.

"Thank you for accepting my request." Alastor told Lelouch as he handed him a slip of paper. "Next time don't be a stranger and act like you don't know me. It hurts my feelings. Just a shame we won't have a full-blown turf war now but, alas, I shall find fun some other way."He went on as Lelouch opened the paper and read its brief content.

_They're All Gone. You Did This. You Won't Escape Your Fate._

Lelouch frowned at the paper, crumpling it up and tossing it aside. Before it touched the ground the ball of paper caught fire and burned up, leaving nothing behind.

"All that work, and a disappointing letter from your parents." Alastor said. "Not much in the way of good payment. Well, cheer up now. You did a splendid job and I'm sure I'll meet you fellas again! For now, you gentlemen have a great rest of your day." Alastor's tone became more sinister, but Lelouch didn't seem to pay attention. That last sentence was shaking him to his core. Gripping his fists tight, he knew Van and Yoshika could never know what his true intentions were. Seeing this pent-up anger and guilt made the whole fiasco all the more worthwhile to Alastor, who knew that there would be use for them later.


End file.
